18 October 2009

Excerpts from the liberal bible

"The rich man's wealth is Obama's property; the ruin of the poor is his opportunity."

"In all labor there is profit. But mere talk leads to The Oval Office."

"You shall not murder, unless the victim is unborn, a white cop, or an old person who isn't useful anymore."

"I am Barack your god, who brought you out of the land of individual liberty. You shall have no other gods before me."

"The Lord giveth and Obama taketh away."

"Obama: come unto me all ye that labor and are heavy laden and i will confiscate and scam ye and strip ye of thy fruits."

"He shall come in the spirit and power of Jimmy Carter."

"And on the Seventh Day, Barack said, let us rest with beer in hand, and thus it came to pass... that he has done nothing."

"The poor you shall always have with you...right now lets take care of the unions."

"Mine teleprompter is a light unto my path and a lamp unto my feet."

"Like a tree that is planted by the water-your far right ideology shall not be moved."- AMEN

"... And on the 7th day Barack rested for the Olympics had gone to Rio."

"... And so Barack turned the water into Kool aid."

"Blessed are the poor, for Barack shall give them your money."

"If we share a beer w/ him he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins."

"Thou SHALT covet thy neighbor's wife w/ impunity - UNLESS you are a Conservative."

"... And Jesus said,"Does it not say in the book of Karl...unto each according to his need?"

"For what will it profit them if they gain the whole world but lose the majority in congress?"

"... And thou shalt love the public option w/ all thine soul,mind,heart,and strength."

"... And God created Harry Redi and no one has been able to figure out why to this day."

"Obama said,"before the cock crows thrice, one of you will betray me. "And Robert Reich said "Lord, is it I?"

"... And Barack said unto the Republicans, Get thee behind me Satan for I never knew you."

"For you know the hour when I will come for your money, it is every hour."

"Father don't forgive them for they disagree with me."

"Come,follow me and I will make you fishers of emails and tweets."

"Wheresover your wallet shall be, there will my hand be also."

"... And if anyone slap you on the one cheek ...Call him a racist."

"Love thine enemies and sell out your allies."

"When he had seen the face of Nancy Pelosi - Jesus Wept."

"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, but I calleth you not a person until age 2."

"Surely re-distribution and massive taxation shall follow me all the days of my life."

“The husbandman that not laboureth must be first partaker of the fruits of his neighbor.”

"... And on the third day Barack still hadn't made up his mind."

"I will fear no evil, for Barack shall meet with them without preconditions."

"Do unto others what YOU think is best for them."

"Let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air,& over the cattle..& then give them lawyers."

"Thou shalt not be accountable for thyself."

"Blessed are the appeasers...for they shall inherit the Nobel Peace Prize."

"Those who dwell in the shelter of the most high, probably got a subprime mortgage from Fannie Mae & Freddie Mac."

"Adultery shall be determined by what the meaning of 'is' is."

"... And when Barack created the earth he looked upon it and said...that Kanye West is a jackass."

"... And when Barak came upon the money changers in the temple...he bailed them out."

"Physician - heal whoever I tell you to and send the rest to the death panels."

For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten community organizer..."

"... And Barack fed the multitudes with nothing but rhetoric and kool aid."

"I can do all things through Barack who strengthens me."

"... And by their race shall ye know them."

"... And when the teleprompter broke - Barack wept."

"For all have sinned and come short of the glory of Barack."

"One of you shall betray me tonight.But don't sweat it, we don't punish criminals."

"Thou shalt know the teleprompter and the teleprompter shall set you free."

"The wise man builds his house right next door to Tony Rezko."

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